I once made a steak all by myself.
I played soccer for YMCA when I was little.
People let me believe I was good at soccer.
I called the cops on a hooker. She ripped me off.
I live in New York City.
My beard is ginger, but me being a whiny baby isn’t.
Some people tell me I look like ugly celebrities. Famous is famous right?!
I complimented Will Arnett’s dog instead of saying I’m a fan.
I have a subscription to Brazzer’s.